Saturday, January 31, 2009

And on the Sabbath

Only one moment will really stick with me as anything but a bright spark this week.

We had an OP come in to do an In Patient session with us and my Psyche.
On seeing her at first glance, i could not help but assume she was in fact a new patient to the programme. I can not, and will not be the girl that is always looked at as 'had anorexia'. Nor do i want to always be on the verge of recovered and/or break down.

But what i DO want? What i WILL want.. and what i now have discovered about myself, my heart and my true self.

Outweigh the negatives five billion to nolch.
Could have spent the rest of my life telling myself things can and will change. But to change a thought we tend to always fear the fear itself and never the outcome. And fuck, i thought i knew what a change to a chance was. We don't know how to take a chance anymore. Bubblewrapped like signets in a duckrace.

I could pun my way out of a paper bag, seriously.
We can push and push until there is nothing left. Or we can soldier the best possible way

Oh, if you only knew the inside joke right now.

There are some things better left unsaid, for everything else... there's mastercard... and ebay.


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